Usually when we feel wronged, our only intention is to get revenge. The slogan "Correct all wrongs with one intention" is trying to cheer us up a bit, lighten up the situation, and add some space. The "one intention" is to exchange oneself for others. This is the key. To correct all wrongs with one intention is to hear what's being said, to see the person who is in front of you, and to be able to rest in not knowing what to say or how to act but just to watch and wait. Then out of your mouth comes something, because the person in front of you is saying, "Well, what do you think?" or "I don't know, see if you can convince me to do it your way," or they're just yelling at you.

If simply to learn how to communicate were our life's challenge, not only might we be able to help find food for people who are hungry and shelter for people who are homeless, but we might even see a fundamental change - less aggression on the planet and more cooperation.

We ARE different; we are very different from each other. One person's idea of what is polite is someone else's idea of what is rude. In some cultures it's considered rude to belch when you're eating, and in others it shows that you enjoyed your meal. What might smell repulsive to one person might smell wonderful to another. We are really different, and we have to acknowledge that. But instead of going to war because of our differences, let's play soccer. It will be a strange game, given our instruction to let others have the victory and keep the defeat to ourselves, but that doesn't mean that we play to lose; it means that we play to PLAY. We could play TOGETHER, even though we're on opposite teams. There are no big stakes, just playing. There are different teams; otherwise the game won't work. But it doesn't have to lead to World War III or the destruction of the planet.

One of my favorite dharma teachers is Dr. Seuss; he captures the human condition so beautifully. One of his stories starts with two people walking toward each other along a narrow road. When they meet, they each refuse to step to the side so that the other can pass. Everyone else builds bridges and even whole cities around them, and life just goes on. But the two stubborn ones stand there for the rest of time, refusing to budge. It never occurs to them even after eighty-five years that they could be curious about why the other is refusing to move, or that they could try to communicate. They could have had a really interesting debate in all those years even if they had still never moved.

The point is not that you're trying to achieve harmony or smooth everything out. Good luck, if that's your goal. The point is to live together on this earth with our differences, to communicate for its own sake. The process is the main thing, not the fruition. If you achieve your goal with aggressive tactics, nothing really changes anyway.

Dr. Seuss tells another story about the Sneetches. The superior race, the ones that everybody aspires to be like and also the ones that everybody hates, are the Star-Belly Sneetches; they have stars on their bellies, and everybody else doesn't. One very clever fellow knew how predictable these Sneetches were, so he came in with a big machine that would put a star on your belly. All the Sneetches Without a star on their belly rushed in and came out with a star on their belly, but of course the original Star-Belly Sneetches still knew who-and how superior-they were. They weren't thrown by this at all. But to facilitate this very predictable situation, the same clever fellow came along with a new machine by which you could go in and get the star taken off your belly. So all the Star-Belly Sneetches went into this machine and came out without stars on their belly; the superior ones were now without stars.

The clever fellow kept these two machines going. Sneetches were running in and out, and the money was piling up, but after awhile all the Sneetches experienced shunyata. They didn't know who was who or what was what or who was a Star-Belly Sneetch and who was a non-Star-Belly Sneetch, so after awhile they just had to look at each other without labels or opinions.

From START WHERE YOU ARE by Pema Chdrn, 1994.
Published by arrangement with Shambhala Publications, Inc., Boston.