Now it's time for us to continue our journey and "walk it like we talk it." One of the final slogans is "Observe these two, even at the risk of your life." It refers once again to the refuge and bodhisattva vows. It has a sense of urgency -"even at the risk of your life" -that's telling us not to be afraid to leave the nest. Don't be afraid of losing ground or of things falling apart or of not having it all together.

The meaning of observing the essence of the refuge vow even at the risk of your life is "no escape, no problem." To observe the Bodhisattva vow is to exchange ourselves for others and develop compassion for ourselves and others. So even at the risk of our own lives, if it's painful, breathe it in and think about all of the other people who are experiencing pain. If it's delightful, give it away and wish for all people to have that delight. That's the essence of this slogan; it's a revolutionary idea.

Here is one last story about exchanging self for others. I met a young man who had been on a spiritual journey most of his life. He was awake but smug. He suffered from what's called spiritual pride. He was complaining about his girlfriend, who was having a hard time giving up smoking; the anxiety was triggering an old eating disorder. The young man said he just kept telling her to be strong, not to be so fearful, to be disciplined. And she would tell him, "I'm trying. I'm really trying. I'm doing the best I can." He was angry because it didn't seem to him that she was trying. He said, "I know I shouldn't be getting so angry about this. I know I should be more compassionate. But I just can't help it. It gets under my skin. I want to be more understanding, but she's so stuck." Then he heard himself say, "I'm trying. I'm really trying. I'm doing the best I can." When he heard himself saying her words, he got the message. He understood what she was up against, and it humbled him.

I think that all of us are like eagles who have forgotten that we know how to fly. The teachings are reminding us who we are and what we can do. They help us notice that we're in a nest with a lot of old food and old diaries, excrement and stale air. From when we were very young we've had this longing to see those mountains in the distance and experience that big sky and the vast ocean, but somehow we got trapped in that nest, just because we forgot that we knew how to fly. We are like eagles, but we have on underwear and pants and shirt and socks and shoes and a hat and coat and boots and mittens and a Walkman and dark glasses, and it occurs to us that we could experience that vast sky, but we'd better start taking off some of this stuff. So we take off the coat and the hat and it's cold, but we know that we have to do it, and we teeter on the edge of the nest and we take off. Then we find out for ourselves that everything has to go. You just can't fly when you are wearing socks and shoes and coats and pants and underwear. Everything has to go.

From START WHERE YOU ARE by Pema Chdrn, 1994.
Published by arrangement with Shambhala Publications, Inc., Boston.